Month: June 2018

Posted on

Social/philosophical commentary # 1332 (blog 6/28/2018)

 

If you don’t know me already, let me introduce myself. I’m a blogger, poet, philosopher, fiction author, and indie publisher (among many other things, of course) and this is what I do. I deconstruct the world and myself continually. My blogs/articles/rants are my account of some of that. Welcome aboard.

I’ve come out of a very fundamentalist background and have been on an amazing (if horribly painful and trying) spiritual, personal journey. Part of that has been reaching out and connecting with those I never connected with before. I now have friends who are atheists, agnostics, evangelicals, Buddhists, seekers of all kinds and many who feel disenfranchised from all of it, (religion). I’ve found that once we get out of the cocoon of our own little personal worlds and reach out to truly love and connect with other people, find common ground with them, it can be life-changing.

I believe it is a total misinterpretation of scripture to believe that—due to one’s spiritual or religious beliefs, we are to isolate ourselves from “them” and keep ourselves apart. (How can you go into all the world and stay utterly separate at the same time??) My love and compassion for all of mankind has ramped up, in fact, exploded. My mindset is so different now that I find a real disconnect with many of my old church friends. They don’t get it. That’s ok. I’m not here to judge, just sharing my journey. My hope is always to connect with some out there who may need to hear something I have to say or may relate to it in some way… the goal? Peace, unity and more love, understanding and compassion in the world. I often have people telling me to stop explaining myself, but I won’t because it is how I try to make connection with others. I won’t, however, apologize for it.

So, recently I have begun some discussions with people from all over the country and the world about many of these things (love, compassion, peace, how to get there) and it has been very eye-opening, because here’s the thing: when you dare to step out of your comfort zone and reach out to people, NOT with an agenda outside of love and compassion, you begin to realize some crucial, world-view altering things.

1)     Almost everyone everywhere wants to do what is right, please their God if they believe in one, find love, raise a family in a peaceful community and bring about peace on the planet. You absolutely would never think that if you stay in your cocoon and listen only to media coverage.

2)     People are AMAZING! There are some good/great hearts and souls out there, people who are trying to save/change the world. (Yes, there are the other kind, too, but mostly they are broken and hurting people who need help.) Not excusing evil or crime. I DO believe there is evil in this world, but we do not fight it by hiding ourselves away.

3)     People who may have different opinions/beliefs than mine are not necessarily evil. This is a pervasive thought in religious communities. If we continue to write people off as hopeless sinners, this world will never change. Maybe people feel hopeless because nobody ever reaches out to them with love and compassion.

I’ve even spent a good bit of time lately thinking about how the media and politics has done a wonderful job of dividing us all, one from the other. I think about what Jesus would do. What would Jesus say about building walls? Separating children from parents? Refusing to do business with those who do not share our beliefs? And not just that but reviling them and hating them. (If you have God’s love for someone, you WILL NOT behave in a non-loving way, it just doesn’t add up. Reality check.)

There’s been a pervasive and downright evil (in my opinion) leaning in the Christian community over the years that has gotten worse and worse…. If you are different, you are wrong and evil and I cannot talk to you or be around you. I cannot express how deeply this wounds my soul. I will not be a part of it anymore. (Look up Westboro Baptist if you need further insight.)

When I first began my journey, I had to throw out all I thought I knew and start over, just me and my Creator. And for a while I couldn’t believe in one of those either. The great thing about that (as painful as it is) is that I no longer accepted things at face value, I did not “do as I was told” or believe as I was told, I began the arduous process of wrestling it all out on my own. I know why more people don’t do it. It’s very painful and time-consuming. But if you make the time and take the time, I guarantee you will never be the same again (in a GOOD way!!!).

So, to sum up, please think about what you believe and why. If you believe in scripture, as you read each one, ask yourself the deep questions: Is this for today or historical/allegorical? Does this align with the heart of a loving compassionate God? Could this verse warrant further study to discern the original language and intent? Who was it written by and what could their agenda/culture have been about at that time? (I have studied scripture a lot. It became more and more confusing to me which made me dig deeper and deeper.)

Don’t have a hand-me-down belief system, or a system of belief which propagates hate or separatism. I beg of you, don’t. It might be better not to have a religion at all.

Ask the DEEP HARD questions and don’t settle for pat answers. The world needs love, hope, compassion, change. It needs you and me, but at our loving best.

Peace out!

 

 

Posted on

A Weighty Subject

My amazing DIL Whittney Chauta has inspired me to write about weight today.

I can remember being a kid and being told by my parents that I needed to lose 15 or 20 pounds. They offered to buy me clothes if I did. They were operating on what they knew. They didn’t know, and I didn’t know at that time that I had thyroid issues, but even with that aside, I feel like there has been so much emphasis put on just exactly how much we weigh.

My whole life I’ve internalized that message “I need to lose 15 pounds.” I had a boyfriend or two tell me that as a teen and that just reinforced this message in my brain. I’ve lived with that message reverberating around in my head for 50 years.

Society says you must be a certain weight and look a certain way in order to be accepted or loved. What utter BS.

My genes and so many other things have determined what I weigh. At this point in my life, I eat really healthy. I exercise. I deal with several health issues daily. I am finally at a place where I can re-focus. I focus on HEALTH, not what the scale says, which is why I threw my scale away years ago.

I want to break this cycle, in my family, but also help break it in society as a whole. People are not better, more beautiful, more acceptable if they’re thin. This is a holdover of being told we must be perfect little playthings for men.

My husband loves me just the way I am, and my weight has fluctuated a lot over the years for many and various reasons. He has always loved me for me. That’s the way it should be.

I find it demeaning as a woman to be told that I have to be thin and “perfect” in order to attract a mate (who himself is imperfect). No. I reject that. Not a trophy wife.

My husband is an amazing soul. So am I, for that matter.

When will we begin to look at the heart and soul instead of the size on the tag in our jeans?

For my kids: I love you all, I love your souls, I love everything about you. You are beauty and grace personified, each one. Not perfect, but perfectly YOU which is all you are required to be. I don’t give a sh*t what your jean size is.

Chase health. Chase love.

For Shaun Chauta Matt Chauta Nathalie Chauta & Megan Abbott

Posted on

Keepin’ it real

“You are so for real.” It is a thread that has run throughout my whole life, as far back as I can remember.
There are times I have talked about things on social media and I can almost literally feel people sneaking up behind me trying to slip a hand over my mouth. It makes people feel awkward or uncomfortable sometimes.
“Why are you sharing this with the world, Pam? Why?”
And my answer is always, This is who I am and I don’t know any other way to be. I don’t want to be any other way. For every person who tries to shush me, there are 10 or 50 or 100 people who message me and say, “Thank you for talking about this. Thank you for making me feel as though I’m not alone. Thank you for talking about something that nobody wants to talk about. I feel the same as you. I connect with you. These are my people. These people are the reason I keep doing it. Big picture.
If I talk about a bout of depression I have had, or an illness I have gone through, or just any every day thing that happens to me, and this offends you or makes you feel awkward, then, go. Step on. Be free. I am not for you.
I will keep on keeping it real, cuz I really don’t know how to NOT, nor do I want to change.
For those that connect with me, who get it, I give a huge fist-bump and a high-five. Keep on keepin’ it real my friends. I’m beginning to realize how rare that really is.
Peace Out! 🙂

Posted on

To Be

 

He’s out there, replacing deck boards and sweating.

I’m in here, trying to recover from bronchitis. Trying to write something.

My banana is half-eaten, looking forlorn. It doesn’t satisfy my hunger.

I think no food will.

Do we all have deep hunger? Is it what drives us to do everything we do? For those of us who analyze it all, yes. What will fit this hole so expertly to make it no longer gape? Is it God? Stillness? Peace?

Is it a thing or the absence of a thing? Do I need to add something or take something away in order to be perfectly whole?

Think of the many things that you try to fill yourself up with, list them in your mind. Is it working? I’d really love to know.

Why are we bombarded with the message that we must be perfect, whole, happy, at peace, and then everyone tells us their way to do this. I just want to be.

I just want to BE.